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..It took me close to three years, but I finally had resolved to tell my mom. As I've told before, there was finally the right place, the right time, and then I discovered that I just couldn't go through with it. I couldn't face the possibilities of her disappointment in me. As it turns out, I never did find the courage to tell her.It all goes back to the question of maintaining "face". After having been so universally disregarded and despised, and then having had things somewhat better when I'd reached adulthood, maintaining people's regard for me became all-important. I couldn't face the possibility of going back to that place where everyone thought I was kind of strange.It took me a long time to get over that. Long time? Yeah. I came out to a few people, privately, in the late 1980's. In the early 90's I got involved with a gender program in Milwaukee, went through all the sessions and groups and testing, and finally had a firm diagnosis (which, of course, only confirmed what I'd. " The men chuckled.The group assembled before him represented the cream of Max's army. Most had military or law enforcement training and at least five kills apiece to their name. While his numbers were rapidly dwindling, Max was confident that these trained killers would not fail him.He had made the mistake of assigning his less experienced men to the rehab center and the Three Crosses mineshaft. He hadn't expected Liv to come into possession of a deadly, armored vehicle. Without the strange vehicle, Max had no doubt that she would already be dead or captured.Max's mind wandered, as the men thoroughly examined the pictures and got into a heated argument about what they were up against. Liv would pay for what she had done to his army. More than anything, Max hated training new recruits, and he resented her for forcing him to find new staff to fill his mercenary group.The anger management unit at the rehab center had a hidden, sinister application. The majority of the patients who came.
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